Are you addicted to Facebook?

You know you are addicted to Facebook if:

  • You check your Facebook page before having your first cup of coffee or even before going to the bathroom in the morning.
  • Stopping before you leave the house to inform everyone that you are about to leave the house.
  • You are spending more time changing your status update than actually doing anything worth commenting on.
  • You are changing your profile picture every time you change your clothes to keep it recent.
  • You start using Facebook as a verb. As in “I’m going to “Facebook” so and so or I was “Facebooking” last night.
  • If you interrupt an actual conversation that you are having with a person and tell them “you know what, why don’t I just “Facebook” you later…
  • Every time you take a picture you wonder if it is going to be Facebook worthy.
  • You leave a party early because you can’t wait to get all of the pictures you just took up on the computer and tagged.
  • You plan all of your social activities on Facebook instead of using the phone.
  • You get jealous of other peoples plans and feel left out even though you don’t personally know them.
  • You are unsure whether you are actually “in” a relationship until the other person makes it Facebook official in the Relationship Status section.
  • You feel you might need therapy because someone you barely knew 20 years ago won’t accept you as a friend.
  • You get mortally offended if no one responds to the clever quote it took you 20 minutes to come up with.
  • You wonder how you could have possibly wronged a person who is on a mutual friend’s page but not on yours. Such as “What did I ever do to them that they don’t want to be my friend too?”
  • You purposely try to recruit people you do not even know to up your “friends count”.
  • You pretend that you are doing some really exciting things so others will find you interesting enough to want to be your friend too.
  • You engage in a “war of wills” not wanting to be the one to actually invite someone to be your friend and wondering how long it will take for them to ask you.
  • You invite someone you can’t stand to be your friend because you simply must know what they are up to or because you simply cannot miss out on anything.
  • You actually click the Wall To Wall on other peoples’ pages because you absolutely have to know the entire conversation they were having.
  • You want to throw something at the computer when you can’t find the original question that was asked that elicited an interesting response from someone.
  • You are looking forward to your birthday for the first time in years because you want to see how many wall posts you will get that day.
  • Getting angry at people who didn’t wish you a Happy Birthday because “C’mon…it’s on Facebook!…There is no excuse for forgetting!”
  • Instead of looking forward to your vacation, you are more worried about what you are going to miss on your computer while you are gone.
  • Completely changing your cell phone plan and your cell phone because your current one doesn’t have access to Facebook.
  • You have to pretend you don’t know someone when meeting them for the first time, yet you know their deepest, darkest secrets thanks to a mutual friends’ pages.
  • You only check your email to see if you have an update on Facebook.
  • You suddenly have 200 emails in your inbox and they are all Facebook updates. Which then leads to…
  • Spending two hours going through each email making sure you didn’t miss anything when you checked your profile page.
  • Feeling horrendously guilty that you didn’t immediately respond to a comment someone left for you 2 days ago. How could you possibly have missed it?
  • You get insane if your friend number drops and you go crazy trying to figure out who deleted you.
  • If your Facebook wall looks like it is covered with graffiti because you have so many applications on it.
  • Your usual bedtime is now two hours later than it has been in years.
  • As soon as you meet someone the first thing you do is go home and “Facebook” them.
  • Not having access to someone else’s profile can push you over the edge.
  • Trying to come up with creative ways you can create a new Facebook account and become their friend so they will not know it is you trying to spy on them.
  • You start losing huge chunks of time and wonder where on Earth the day went.
  • You find yourself making up lies about what you “did all day” to compensate for all those lost hours.
  • Your house is getting messier as the weeks go by and you have no clean laundry.
  • You are one of the few people who uses the Facebook chat option.
  • You can’t stop nagging other reasonable people to join Facebook. Like teenage peer pressure, it’s o.k. for you to do it as long as others are doing it as well.
  • You call into work sick because you just came across all of your old photos and have a ton of scanning and tagging to do.
  • You visit sites and articles that list the reasons you are addicted to Facebook.

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